Not Today

¡Ay mi madre! Let's see what else goes wrong today.

Woke up with a tooth that feels like fire,

Late already, cause my clock don't lie.

Hit the door, lock clicks behind me—

Great. Guess who left the keys inside? Me!

Tried to breathe, but the world said "nope,"

Fell in the mud, lost all my hope.

Looking like a mess on a runway day,

But you know I'll still serve it anyway.

Crow swoops in like it owns the place,

Steals my keys—gone, no trace.

Climbed the ladder, ladder said "slide,"

Now I'm wearin' scratches like a fashion line.

Every plan I had—cancelled twice,

Life's throwing shade but I look nice.

Covered in mud, but I'ma still slay,

Call it chaos-chic, call it cliché.

¡No me lo puedo creer!

I mean, really? A bird, a fall, a toothache, mud—

It's giving "main character," but with no budget.

¡Vaya!

~

At this point, I'm just waiting for lightning.

If this is a test—yeah, I'm passing with sarcasm.